"Welcome sons of fuckin’ bitches to the wicked carney theater! Tonight’s feature presentation is so fuckin’ scary, it’ll take the wrinkles out of your nut sack and fade your butt hair. So get ready mutha fuckers for tonight’s main atraction! I
give to you: Ol’ Evil Eye! Ah ha ha ha!"
"Alright shut the fuck up!"
"Start tha movie."
"I loved the old man. He had never wronged me. He had never given me insult. For his gold I had no desire. I think it was his eye. Yes, it was this. One
of his eyes resembled that of a vulture. A pale, blue eye with a film over it.
Whenever it fell upon me, my blood ran cold. And so, by degrees, very gradually, I made up my mind to take the life of the old man and thus rid myself of the eye forever."
So I’m headed door to door
With my grandmother’s cookie jar.
I’m sellin’ cookies, 12 for a dollar.
I ring the doorbell, nobody wants any.
I resort to goin’ cheaper – 2 for a penny.
Anybody, everybody, they hate me.
I can tell when they spit and degrade me.
There’s only one house left, the last on the block.
Old Man Willie on the hilltop.
I ring the doorbel, the door creeps open.
And there it was starin’ and scopin’.
The man’s left eye, red, big, and drippin’
I was trippin’. "Ahh, seeya!"
I ran home. I couldn’t stop thinking
About his eyeball winking and blinking.
And it looked not a damn thing like the other. Ugh!
Shoulda wore a patch on the motherfucker.
It hypnotized me, mesmorized me.
Traumatized, paralyzed, terrorized me.
Creepers, where’d you get that ball?
And tell me how it even fits in your skull.
I want a big long knife to stick it in.
I wanna lift up the eyelid and kick it in.
He’s gotta die. I want his eye buried in my backyard.
It ain’t hard, I’m killin’ Old Evil Eye!
Oh-Oh-Eye (The bitch gon’ die! Die-die-die-die-die-die-die)
"Now this is the point. You fancy me mad. Madmen know nothing. But you should’ve seen me. You should have seen how wisely I proceeded with caution with
what foresight, with what patience I went to work. I was never kinder to the old man than during the whole week before I killed him."
A day gone pass since I heard about J.O.
Met up in this sleigh, cuz I don’t fuckin’ play.
Anyway, I gotta do him in. Got a rusty revolver
Put the silver bullets in.
I’m plannin’ on playin’ one right to his nugget.
Down my drawers with the bucket.
It’s time to go, fuck it.
I stuck it up… to his neck when he came to the door.
I really didn’t know what I was in for.
First the cold man stared, no a gaze, no a stare.
Kinda like there was no one there.
How weird, my body froze with the blink of his eye.
Evil eye, sendin’ chills up my spine.
What to do? What to do? I gotta try to break.
I gotta try to make.. my way to the gate.
Wait. I can’t move, I’m stuck to the ground.
W-What the fuck was that? I think I heard a sound,
Turned around, there it was, starin’ at my face.
This little old man’s eye’s a make me a mental case.
That’s when I felt the pain deep inside,
Deep inside, now his eye’s open wide.
"That night it ceased. The old man was dead. I placed my hands on the
heart and there for many minutes there was no pulsation. He was stone dead. His eye
will trouble me no longer. His eye will trouble me no longer."